Thursday, January 18, 2018

Final Treatment

December 23, 2009 by  
Filed under Patricia's Journey

That’s final as in the last treatment, not as in constituting the end, she’s outta here.

The day after Treatment #8 my body starting talking to me.  It was a new message.  It sounded like this: “I have had enough. Time to stop.”  Cancer is within natural order but we are using something that is not within natural order to kill something that is in natural order.  I have reached a tipping point. By definition, tipping point is the culmination of a build-up of small changes that effects a big change.  The big change are the positive results I’m obtaining.  Going further would mean big changes of the negative kind.  The chemo is storing in the body.  That’s what I’m feeling.  The belief of my doctor is that I can take chemo, have a holiday, take chemo, have a holiday, take new chemo drug,  have a holiday, and so on until I die.  That is born of a system that believes there is no cure for cancer.  We are operating under a different belief system.  My  body will go into chaos if I don’t stop now.

With Dr. Sandy, I confirmed the Divine Guidance that this treatment #9 would be my last.  By January 5, we will revisit my naturopathic protocol and see what support my body needs at that time to do what it knows how to do…heal.  And we will have CT scans to monitor my body’s progress.  What does it feel like to know this is the last chemotherapy?  Have you ever felt like there was so much joy in you that you thought you would implode?  or levitate?  or kiss the janitor?  Yea, it was like that. This does not mean I can participate in extreme sports or even spend a full day shopping with the girls.  My mind is still overly motivated for what it is not ready for.  I’m not allowing time to charge my batteries enough for the marathon I’m running.   It does mean a continued high level of self care for the next two years.

Lisa Love, me, Mr. Wizard

It could not have gone better or sweeter for this final treatment.  When I arrived for labs, I was taken in immediately.  That has never happened.  Jim, aka Mr. Wizard, came at 11:00 am for lunch and Lisa Love surprised us by arriving shortly after that. Treatment was scheduled for 11:45 am, so we were planning on leaving the grounds and having a great lunch off campus because oncology always runs at least an hour behind…until today.  They were ready for me at 11:42 am.  Oooooh, this is a good sign! The three of us had a quick, celebratory lunch in the hospital cafeteria.  Lisa and I wore ear to ear grins and Jim had a slight frown because I made him eat his vegetables.  I was on a natural high.  We didn’t plan this lunch.  It was one of those spontaneous, delicious events that could not have unfolded better if it had been planned.  Treatment was easy.  Everyone was a good poker, as in needles.  Last week they passed out crocheted hats that a woman made in honor of her mother who passed over from cancer. They were each unique in their style and colors.  You could feel the love as you held each one.  Today, they shared lovin from the oven home made cookies.  Maybe I’ll go back next week to see what they pass out.  Nah!

Nurse Krystal from oncology

Alexander is having a great time in Omaha with Dad.  They left early this morning to Grandma and Grandpa Rapp’s home in Cozad, Nebraska (the middle of the state).  At this time they are receiving freezing rain through Christmas Eve which will coat the roads with 2-3 inches of ice.  Driving is treacherous, and they made it safely.  Weather.  In the Midwest, if you can’t talk about the weather or your relatives, the coffee shops get real quiet.  When my friends in Omaha tell me of their upcoming holiday travel plans, they would end with “it all depends on the weather.”   In return they kindly ask me about my holiday plans to which I reply, “I will be driving to Honolulu for our Unity Church Christmas Eve Candlelighting service.  But, of course, it all depends on the weather.”  Will I drive with the windows up or down?  I hope that will be my most important decision of the day.

Comments

2 Responses to “Final Treatment”
  1. Leslee Joy says:

    Dear Patricia
    I too remember the wonderful feeling of my last treatment. You have been on my mind, and I regret that I am not very good about staying in touch with your site…..much like some of my other social sites either. But, know that I have been thinking of you often. You are a beautiful human being and are here doing so much for so many. You look as beatiful too as ever! I love you. Happy Holidays!
    Leslee from Omaha

    • Patricia says:

      You and I are sorority sisters in this club! We are connected at the heart-always have been, always will be.
      I love you Leslee!

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