Saturday, April 21, 2018

Praise the good and pass the mustard

May 7, 2010 by  
Filed under Patricia's Journey

From the moment  I made the decision two days ago to reframe this experience and find the good and praise it every day, the Universe has stepped in to make it oh-so-much easier and take it to higher levels.  Feeling poorly was making it tougher to stay floating in hope and trust and I knew I needed Supreme support.

Praise the good every day.  Sounded so simple.   Who knew there was so much more for me?  God did and he wanted me to know it, too, by planting the seed of simply calling me a Lady of Leisure.  Sounded kind of fun.  That persona created a shift in my thinking perspective, and I could see where this was heading.  I read about Ladies of Leisure.  I have known a few in my life. How would a Lady of Leisure move through this experience even while feeling less than perky?   I commit to being whole and in perfect balance and intend it in prayer and meditation, yet my body reminds me of the physical reality.  He chose this approach knowing what it would do for the whole of me.  Tell it like it is from the perspective of a Lady of Leisure instead of the ego’s ill, powerless Patricia.  They are both present inside you.  Who do you want to play with?

While I still felt physically tired, inside I felt very different about being tired.  My first choice was to change the way I walk– slowly and gracefully with purposeful steps, raising my chin up and shoulders back.   No hurries.  No worries.   Or I could continue to slouch forward, breathe shallow, lean on counters and sigh a lot.   It only took a matter of minutes for me to feel the the difference in my physical being and how it was affecting my mind.  Something in this seemingly simple process is transmuting on my subconscious level as well.

Don’t you love it that someone knows you SO well and if you allow it, He can co-create a life with you that works?   I’m getting an extreme holy make-over.   This may not make any sense to anyone other than me and God.  I know the genius behind what He has invited me to be and do.  I’ve been with this body and mind for 53 years.  God is holding my hand as we cross the street.  Most of my life I have crossed the street without you, my Friend and Creator, for the sparkle on the other side.  With you, I can create the life of passion, joy, fun, love, wisdom, harmony, wholeness, community, service, unity, creativity, action, oneness and transformation that I choose in this lifetime…and a sparkle that never fades.

In the span of two days, God has brought to my attention stories of audacity, bravery, resilience and hardihood.  I found new depths of courage through the stories of others.  As my friend Laurie says, we typically want to compare up to other people.  In other words, why can’t I have an experience like that person…something a little easier and gentler (from our perspective)?  Here is what the Universe brought to my attention over the following two days after making the shift above:

Last night, Alexander and I watched the movie “Antwone Fisher” with Denzel Washington as a Navy psychiatrist.  It is about a young man, Antwone, who is required to see Denzel for anger management.  The story of  Antwone’s childhood abuse unfolds. The movie focuses on his journey to create a life made up of his dreams and not someone’s else’s shadow.  It is a story of resilience, fortitude and the power of choice we each have.

After chemo, I sat outside to watch for Laurie coming to pick me up.  There was a man sitting in front of me.  Typically, I would be reading something and not wanting to connect with those around me.  But I am a Lady of Leisure now. I notice people. He was eating a hot dog and loving every bite.  In front of him was another man eating a hot dog.  Now, what are the odds of that unless you’re at a ballgame?  I watched it all from the first bite to the last.  The condiments oozing out of the warm bun.  I’m sure it was warm.  He was a pickle relish guy, too.   Yes, I have eaten hot dogs.  I remember what they taste like.   And I have loved them. With everything, please.  I was envious as I drank my Vitamin Water and thought of the multi-vitamin powder with flax seed I had earlier.  I imagined and visualized when I would eat a hot dog again.  I like the anticipation of savoring it and that it’s not an itch that has to be scratched right away.   Perhaps we would get a group of afficionados and have a progressive hot dog sampling. Think of the memories we would create, not to mention pictures!   My friend Pamela and I would always get hot dogs at the movie theatre in Omaha.  The movie might disappoint us, yet the hot dogs never would.   When Laurie pulled up in the circular drive, I got up to leave and walked by the hot dog man and said “that was the best hot dog I have ever not eaten!”  Here is the discreet photo I took of the men.   It is shadowy to conceal their identities.

man eating hot dog

Laurie and I were able to do some errands on the way home.  As we were walking in the first store, a young paralyzed man in a wheelchair was coming out.  He was tended to by a woman.  It is said  if we were standing together in front of a large clothesline and everyone were to hang their troubles on the line, and you could choose anyone else’s problems, you would choose your own. Many times I have wanted anything but this cancer experience.  Seeing this young man made it easier to own mine.  I know what it takes to move through my experience.  What it takes to move through his does not seem tantamount to mine.  It seems insurmountable.  Today, I have the courage to be and do what I am being called to be and do.  You like to think you have what it takes to be in someone else’s shoes, but you never really know…and you admit you don’t always want to find out.  I accept this experience as being right and perfect for the evolution of my Soul.  If it weren’t necessary, it wouldn’t be happening.

A friend shared with me abuse happening to children living near her home and what her options for action might be.  My heart aches for children suffering abuse.  I can metafizzle by waxing philosophical on the metaphysics of their Soul choosing their journey and la de da.  Well, what about my journey?  Our paths have crossed and these children need a voice, or at the very least to know there are people in the world who care. There are no accidents when we are made aware of another’s plight. It may not make a difference in the course of their life and perhaps God would have me do nothing, but that is not for me to decide.  It is for me to decide to take authentic action when Spirit nudges me to do so.  This seems a good time to remember a story you no doubt have heard many times, yet one I never tire of hearing again and again:

The Starfish Story

One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed

a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.

Approaching the boy, he asked, “What are you doing?”

The youth replied, “Throwing starfish back into the ocean.

The surf is up and the tide is going out.  If I don’t throw them back, they’ll die.”

“Son,” the man said, “don’t you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish?

You can’t make a difference!”

After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish,

and threw it back into the surf.  Then, smiling at the man, he said…

“I made a difference for that one.”

Original Story by: Loren Eisley

I was not planning on watching Oprah today because of the featured story.  Yes, sometimes God will tell you to watch Oprah. She featured four children who made international headlines when they were discovered by authorities starving to death at the hands of their adoptive parents.  They had become part of the foster care system, then adopted by the foster care couple who from that point forward systematically and methodically starved them and kept them locked in their house for ten years.  Once adopted, no further visits were required by Social Services.  Why didn’t the boys tell anyone?  They did.  A teacher–who didn’t believe them and told their mother what the young boy had said. Believe the children. Then they were “home schooled”.   They have since been adopted by a loving family.  The father works in the foster care system and met the boys when he was asked to mentor them. When asked what they would say to their foster/adoptive mother who was recently released from prison after serving only four years, one boy said he would tell her “thank you”.  Through the contrast of his previous life, he has a deep appreciation for freedom, his new adoptive family, knowing genuine love and appreciating that food will always be there. I am not my story.  I am not my cancer.

Following that horror story was one about a woman with neurofibromatosis.  This condition causes nerve tissue to grow tumors. On Anna it caused large tumors weighing two pounds to take over the left side of her face.  To avoid the reaction of people, she rarely went out in public; young children would see her and scream.  Adults would stare.  No doctor would perform surgeries. Then she met a plastic surgeon who worked with Anna through his charitable entity and performed surgeries to remove the tumors.  While still mildly disfigured, she is speaking out to let others know that she chooses to lead a normal life. She is a “spokesperson” for others suffering from the abuse inflicted by a judgmental society who still sees beauty as skin deep.  I am only bald.

“Do not judge, and you will never be mistaken.”

~ Jean Jacques Rousseau

Laurie just arrived with dinner.  We love hearing her at our door.  Dianna came on Monday and Tuesday.  They arrange a schedule and all I need to know is that an angel is delivering dinner.  And it is a very good thing.

Dianna and Laurie

God brought Laurie to me and she brought Dianna into my life.  She is a ten year breast cancer survivor and understands the importance of having healthy meals delivered.  Marta and Eileen just stopped by.  They know Dianna and she told them about me.  They want to know what they can do to help.  Marta is from Brazil and would love to bring over some cuisine from her homeland.  And the circle widens. And love has new places to be and express.

Your prayer support is requested to see my white blood cell count numbers going up, up, up. White blood cells protect the body against infection and at this time we would like to see mine higher.  They are the lowest they have ever been, so it’s all up from here! See them at the right number that puts them in harmony with what my body needs. We don’t need to know a specific number. See my liver rested and clear of cancer activity.  Put me on any prayer list you can find.  It is all powerful.  When you think of me ask God to bathe me in His white and gold Healing Divine Light.  Let it permeate every cell and any darkness in my body and field.  Give thanks and it is done.  I’m already knowing it and celebrating with you.

Thank you God for revealing yourself to me this week in ways I could not miss.  Thank you for the faces of God in my life I call my friends.  Thank you for it all.  It is all good.


One Response to “Praise the good and pass the mustard”
  1. Jan Johnson says:

    i will continue to pray for you and have had you on my prayer lists. What a treasure to read your gift of writing this morning. I love you Patty and continually admire your courage and strength. Loved the hot dog story! What beautiful calm faces Dianna and Laurie have. Come on white blood cells…forward HO there is work to be done!!!!! Love you more than all the white blood cells in the universe streaming down into your Divine Body and Soul, Jan PS Happy Mother’s Day my friend!

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